Thursday, December 3, 2009

While Dave Was Away

Two weeks ago while we were in the throws of H1N1 and sick as dogs, Dave (lucked out) had to go on a business trip to Omaha. I had big plans for while he was away. I was finally going to paint the hall and fix the stairs. It didn't work out. What did happen (because something always does) is I got the shit scared out of me and made it impossable for me to go to bed at night until he came home. Before I go on with telling what happened, I first must say that this door (the one the chairs leaning against) has been in this house waaaay before we lived here. What you don't see is the holes at the top of the door showing where someone punched the door many times. I used to hide the holes with calenders and pictures but after awhile I just said screw it. Now I stare at it and wonder what kind of man would punch a door? I also wonder if he was kind of whimpy because I think I could throw a better punch.
Now on to the story.
As most of you know, we have an outdoor wood boiler. That means I have to go outside to fill the wood boiler. It really is not a big deal. With the exception of not having very good lighting in the barn where the wood is stacked. I'm a big scaredy cat and hate to put wood in the stove after dark. Dave on the other hand doesn't think that it's a big deal. And has ignored my pleas for massive lighting.
The very first night Dave is gone, I go out at 10:00pm for the final fill up of the evening. I go out through the basement and not the barn. This is important to know because if someone was in my barn or milling around the barn they wouldn't know I came outside. It had got quite cold out and the mud and water on the ground had started to freeze.
I go into the part of the barn where the wood is and fill up an armload of wood. I can't see well because it is really dark out. I put an armload into the stove and head back into the barn. Once inside I stand for a minute to check out which pieces of wood I want and that's when I hear crunching of footsteps. I can't see a flipping thing though. Not only is it very dark but separating me and where I hear crunching is a John Deere front end loader. I can't see around it. The crunching stops for a minute but then continues. I AM FREAKING OUT! No one and I mean no one ever comes by the barn. We have almost four acres behind our house that go to the river and get foot traffic heading that way but no one comes by the house. I have nothing to protect myself with and I'm home alone with the kids. FUCK!
So I say very loudly,"Who's out there?" The crunching stops right then. Of course no one answers. I run through the side door and back in the basement. Chrissy is sitting on the steps waiting for me and I tell her to go up and lock all doors and have Marian go to all windows and make sure they are locked. We have twenty two windows, twenty six counting the ones in the basement.
I then shut off the basement light and crack open the door. Someone is out in the bottom of our barn. No, I didn't call the police they wouldn't have done anything within a two hour period and by then we would have been dead if that's what someone intended.
So again, I hollered out,"Hey, who's out there?" No answer. So I did the only thing I could do at that point, I yelled bad (very) bad words at them. I hurled out a bunch of them. I won't regale you with my wit because it truly is obvious that I am trashy.
I then shut the door a locked it. I took a glass table top and tilted it against the door and stacked a bunch of boxes in front of that. Yes, I know it wouldn't have kept anyone out but it would have made a lot of noise had someone opened the door. I then littered the floor with roller skates and toys going all the way over to the stairs. Am I boring you yet? I know, I'm sooo long winded. The basement is very dark without the light on and even with a flashlight it is hard to see. I then trucked up the stairs and checked all doors and windows myself.
I propped a chair under the doorknob so if some dumb ass made it that far it would buy us more time to GET OUT. I called my hero husband and explained what had happened and he thought it was just a cat. A Fucking cat. Cat's don't fall through the ice and if they did they sure as hell wouldn't keep doing it! Nor are they that loud. He was no help at all.
So that night and the rest of the nights while my husband was out of town, I sat on the couch with the dog at my feet all night. Waiting for something to happen. Nothing ever did. Well, something did, I never went back out that first night to add the rest of the wood to the stove and the damn thing when out over night and I had a hell of a time getting it started back up. For the rest of the nights after that, I drove the truck out back and shined the high beams all around to see if I saw anyone. I never did.

We did a buch of this though. Laying around. Because I wasn't getting any sleep, I got sick. As a matter of fact I'm still sick, which is why I have not been posting.

The good news is, after a meningitus scare and a mono scare Marian is feeling better!!!!!Posted by Picasa


Stacy D. Briefing said...

Sweet Baby Jeezus, that would have scared the piddle out of me! I'd have been having flashbacks from every old horror flick I was ever stupid enough to watch.

I hate it when Ricardo is out of town. But also figure it would have to be a pretty stupid person who would attempt to make it past 2 Mastiffs. :) Is Dave installing more lights as we speak?

Hope you are feeling better soon and are now getting some much needed rest! So glad Mimi is better!

FishermansDaughter said...

No one can depend on anyone other than themselves. Educate and prepare yourself in the event of someone meaning you harm. Read up on, buy and learn to operate a firearm. Join the NRA - they send you oodles of nifty stickers to put in highly visible places - like the front door. Most crooks can read and will move hurriedly pass a household that advertises "we're packin' heat and are prepared to defend what's ours".

my word is innuto

Mama Goose said...

Holy Hannah woman! I hate it when Dan is away too - I get so creeped out when I hear noises. I'm sorry you had your pants scared off'en you. (did you ever see any tracks the morning after?)

Glad you're all on the mend!