Tuesday, January 25, 2011

Feeling Blue

This morning I got up extra early. I was up at 4:45 AM. I wanted to warm the house up before everyone else got up. Do you think they thanked me for it? Nope, not at all, not one tiny little bit.

Then Marian reminded me that a friend was coming home on the bus with her and staying until basketball practice. She then proceeded to tell me that I needed to not be lazy today and clean the house. (Yes she did) That girl takes after her dad all the way.

Christina, during this time, called from school and couldn't find her math or science books and folders. I had to calm her down because she was freaking out. I knew they weren't here because I picked her up from school on Thursday during second period and brought her back for last period to take a test. She didn't bring home any books. Friday was a snow day and Monday a teacher workshop. None the less I spent a half hour searching through all bags and backpacks in the house. I didn't find any books but I found at least four toothbrushes, one lunchbox with rotting food, six party invitations (that I knew nothing about, and the kids say they never get invited anywhere) three pair of blue jeans, various shirts, hats, gloves and mittens that have been missing since, I think, last winter AND underwear. Then Christina calls from school. She's found her books and I won't have to call and tell her teachers after all. Like I was going to.

Dane gets up this morning and I was ready for him. I made him his favorite steel cut oatmeal or as he calls it-oatmilk. I had it already with a fancy napkin and a big glass of water. Do you think he was happy? No, not Dane he wanted Cocoa Coughs! (cocoa puffs) and it's been all down hill from there.

Trapper ripped an insole from my new LL Bean shoe boots and chewed it. I snarled at Z and now he's not talking to me. The cats keep trying to get into Jonas's tank this morning and kill him. What more can that little fish take? Already he's paralyzed on one side from their malicious attacks. I promised I'd keep him safe. I think the only place at this point he'd be safe is in the toilet.

I went out into the barn and found a bird frozen to death. How much more can I take!???!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!

Aaaaannndddd to top it all off my sister is on a plane heading for Afghanistan. Suck city folks. Suck city.

On the flip side of all of this...... Its only 8:43AM. I can pick myself up and make something of this day. And I think I will.
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Monday, January 24, 2011

He still makes me smile

Almost two weeks ago Z and I celebrated eighteen years of marriage. He still makes me smile. Life is good.
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Wednesday, January 19, 2011

A Conversation

One of my daughters and I were having a conversation the other day. We weren't talking about much but as usual the talk started to be about school and boys. Its always about school, boys, sports, music, work or animals. Not in that order. I try not to talk about boys.
Me: So what happened in school today?
Daughter: Well, all the girls like this one boy.
Me: Do you like him? Because if you do your not allowed to date until your thirty.
Daughter: Ewww MOM I don't want to date! Besides this boy got an F on his progress report card and SHOWED EVERYONE. I swear, He's as dumb as a box of rocks!
Me: Laugh until I cried. End of conversation.

So I guess if you get a failing grade you shouldn't show anyone.
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Tuesday, January 18, 2011

No Pretty Pictures Today

I'm on Z's laptop. I'm not supposed to be on here. But I just can't help myself. I love it. The buttons are big and the u button isn't broken like on the house computer. I wonder if he'll take me to court for breaking into his computer. It has a secret password that took me months (really) to figure out. Then Chrissy figured it out for me. The quick brain of a twelve year old. I wish I had my twelve year old brain back. I wouldn't fry it with all the crap if I could do it over. Sigh, oh well.

I don't even know if he has any pictures on this thing. I'll have to check it out. Well I checked it out and these are the ones I found. Weird. I know he must have more.
Oh here we go the school just called and is letting out early. Bring on the storm. I laugh at storms.   Except today. You may or may not remember the post that I wrote yesterday. The one where I went to Portland to spend the night in a hotel room with my husband so we could um well you know hanky panky. Weeeellllll I got up this morning at 3: 45 all bright eyed and bushied tailed (a saying of my moms) and dropped Z off by 4:45 at the airport. Instead of going back to the hotel and sleeping I decided to high tail it back home to see Chrissy before she got on the school bus at 6:15. I made it. On the other hand since I no longer carry a cell phone I couldn't stay in touch with Z whose plane was supposed to take off at 6am. It did not. Not only did it not take off but Z is sitting in the airport on stand by. I may have to drive back to Portland to pick him up. In the storm. I'll keep you all posted. Until then, stay warm:) 

Monday, January 17, 2011

So much to say and too lazy to write it.

We had a real humdinger of a storm last week. Right in the middle of it I asked Z to go for a walk with me so I cold take some pictures. I'm not a photographer by any means and my pictures really are sub par at best.We got as far as the bridge before I whipped out my camera and started shooting. Of course Dave was my first target. He really likes that. It doesn't look too bad out.
When you see this picture it looks like I'm just snapping a picture of, well the outside.
But I'm not. I'm on the bridge and I'm taking a picture of the water. You just can't see it because of the snow and wind. We didn't walk much further than that. My cheeks were cold.
After we came back to the house Z started plowing and I came in and started making these babies. The picture is awful. They looked more appealing than this. Really they did! I thought they would be hard to make. They weren't. Easy peazy lemon squeezey. Next time though I'm going to use pudding instead of just whipped cream. Delicious.

In other news, today I'm going to take a quick trip and spend the night down in Portland with my husband. He's leaving to go to Vegas in the morning and getting a room tonight down south so he won't have to be up at 1am to make the plane. I'm going down to shack up with him for the night. Yea me!
I know, I know. Why aren't I going with him? Well, it's like this....... He asked me to go and I said yes until I saw how long the flight is. Oh MY WORD. I would be a basket case. By the time that plane landed I would have befriended all of the passengers on that plane. Even the ones that didn't want to talk to me would have been forced to. My nervous talking (that combined with my pills so I won't puke) would have had everyone on board wanting to open the door and push me out. When I brought this point up to Z he just laughed and said probably. That man loves me. He does.
So I'm staying home with my feet on the ground. Except for tonight when I'm going to to romance my love before he leaves.
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Thursday, January 6, 2011


I was supposed to get up early this morning but I didn't wake up until 6:15. Right away I knew it was cold out. Not really, really cold. Just cold. I think its about twenty. I always try to guess what the temperature is before looking. Its a little game I play with myself as I go outside to fill the wood boiler. If I go out and start to fill up the wheel barrel and I can do it without huffing and puffing and my teeth aren't chattering.... It's at least twenty or above. If my nose starts to run its about ten or so. And if I can't
push the wheel barrel full of wood without gasping for breath and my lungs feel like they are going to explode and my bones feel like they are going to snap then I know It's ZERO or below. Those are days that I wished I had stayed in bed.
I went out back (and got snow inside my boots) and took some river pictures this morning. The water looks cold and unforgiving.
On the flip side... the sun looks warm and inviting. Reminding me that summer will come back to us. We just have to get through the rest of January and February. Hopefully no freak snowstorms in March.
I hope tomorrow morning is as beautiful as this morning. If it is I think I'll bundle up and grab a thermos of coffee and go sit by the river for some morning alone time.
Have a great day everyone. The sun is shining and life (even with the bumps) is good.
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Tuesday, January 4, 2011

SO Thankful

Not that long ago (six years) the main door to our house opened up into our dining room. Bringing in all the dirt and cold. It drove me crazy. I thought who would ever put a door in the dining room when you have a door in the kitchen. Side note- the door in the kitchen was boarded up when we moved in and at this point it still was. I also didn't know that at one time my kitchen was part of the barn.
There used to be dark panneling on all of the walls. I pulled it off on an Easter Sunday (another side note-this picture is also on an Easter Sunday.) when a piece of the panneling came up and I got curious and stuck my hand behind the panneling and it came out black. After all of our guests left I ripped off the panneling and bleached. We actually ended up ripping out all of the drywall, insulating and re-drywalling the room. It was an awful mess.
This is what the flooring looked like. My sister scrubbed the crap out of it when we moved in. The water just kept getting dirtier and then we realized that the floor was in such awful shape that she wasn't just washing dirt she was washing up to floor itself. At this point we should have put the house back on the market and run for our lives.
The dog is Riley. I hated that dog. Yeah I know its a strong word but I did. He was the nastiest little shit you've ever met. I did a happy dance when he was struck by a car and killed. He belonged to Kadies friend Inge. She cried like a baby when he died. Sometimes there is no accounting for taste.
We lived in total chaos for years (Idon't know how many but it seemed like forever) before we could finally afford to fix walls and floors.

We started out by fixing the basement first. Replacing the oil burner for a new more efficient one, adding an outdoor wood boiler and then radient heat. We got rid of the forced hot air that made us all cough and sneeze and put in baseboard heat. We poured a basement floor and put cleanspace over the granite walls that let all of the cold and rodents. It was a huge expense. (The first Feb. I lived in the house, Dave was still in Florida, we went through a 250 gallon tank of oil in NINE days. Can you say Crap> Crap on a stick?)

What all of this means right now? It means I am so thankful that our house is warm. As the weather starts to get colder and colder, our floors are warm. At least everywhere but the kitchen, but soon we'll tackle the last bedroom and insulate and then we'll finally be warm in every room. The heat in the kitchen goes straight up into the unfinished room above it and out the roof.

I started the new year off bitchy. It seems that I start many things off that way and it's time for me to do something different. (I was going to say a change, but I want to put money in my pocket not take it out of my pocket) So this week I am going to head over to the local community college and look into taking a class or maybe even two. After all, my kids can't be the only ones that grow.
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Saturday, January 1, 2011

Good Bye 2010

This past year was pretty tame compared to some of our years. We slowed down in some areas and sped up in others. At least no-one close to us died this year. That is always a bonus.
The weather was so made of awesome yesterday that we spent most of the day outside. AND GUESS WHAT!? Trapper is not on a leash! He stayed with us the entire time! I know he's probably scamming something and as soon as I let my guard down he'll be back to chasing cars. The bugger. We sure did have a great time with him though.
Christina bought this hat on her own when she was in Boston. I love it. BUT- if I had bought this for her she would have turned her nose up at it and said I'm not wearing that thing. Why don't you put a blinking light on my head.
Nothing any more precious than a little boy with rosy cheeks that's ready for some cocoa and a nap. I thought for sure that after playing outside all day yesterday that he would wet the bed last night. He didn't. Yea me! (and him)

We stayed home last night. It was the first year the girls stayed up to watch the ball drop. We ordered Chinese food and watched movies while wishing midnight would hurry up and come so we could go to sleep. Mims is so grouchy today that I wanted to lock her outside so she'd stop making my brain thump. I sent all the kids upstairs at 7:30. Mom and dad need some quiet time.

I went to bed last night so happy. When I got up this morning I was all alone and I jumped on face book with my cup of coffee and proceeded to settle in to read every one's posts. I immediately read something that hurt my feelings. Now my feelings don't get hurt too easily. I'm pretty cool with letting things slide but this I couldn't. It just made me realise that I just don't fit in anywhere. I had hoped to leave THAT feeling behind in the seventh grade. By the time Z got up I had wound myself up so much that I wanted to sell the house and leave Maine. Or at least move to where I had no close family because I don't even fit in with my family.
When I finally told Z what was wrong (I'm sure he was thankful to find out it wasn't him.) he said he understood and felt the same way I did but we needed to move past it and understand that it's just me and him. I so want my mom to talk to right now so I can cry on her shoulder. I cleaned the Christmas storage area with such a ferociousness while praying at the same time that Mims asked me if I was mad at God. It took me a minute and I started to laugh. How silly I must have looked to her. I was ranting and raving while wielding the wet and dry vac. What a loon! It also made me realise that even though my feelings were hurt I was hurting my family more by acting crazy. So I finished up what I was doing and came upstairs with a new tude.
The rest of the day was spent helping Kadie out. She's sick with what I had so Z and I went to her house and cleaned. She didn't know that's what we were going to do. She thought we were just dropping something off and leaving. I even cleaned her cats litter box. ICK!!!!

I don't know what the year will bring but I didn't make any resolutions. That way I won't be upset when I can't fulfil them. I have a bunch of wants to do and I'm just going to stick to that for now. I hope everyone had a great night last night, whether you went out and partied, stayed home and snuggled or just went to bed! It's a new year and everyday of it is a new beginning.
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