Tuesday, July 26, 2011

I'm so Vain

Illustration of toothy smile with dollar signs on the teeth photo
License: Royalty-Free
Last week started out to be a great week. VBS, wonderful kids and lots and lots of sunshine!
It all came to a crashing halt last Wednesday morning.
I still can't stop crying about it.
I have (had) a crown on the upper right side (5th tooth from center) of my mouth. On the way to VBS while eating a munchkin felt it slip. Uh Oh, I thought. At first I was upset but then I wasn't. I called the dentist as soon as I was able and they got my in that very afternoon. Dane and Chrissy rode with me the hour and a half trek to the dentist. It was a great trip. Chrissy was an angel. She read a book on the way down and at the end of every chapter she stopped to tell me about it and discuss what happened. We haven't had a discussion that hasn't turned into a pissing match in ages. I was so thankful and proud of her. Dane slept.
I thought (my mistake) that once I got there I would be in and out in the blink of an eye. They would remove the crown, clean it out and cement it back on.
When Dr. N pulled it off I heard a crack and saw his eyes widen. My tears started to fall. Dr. N just kept saying over and over,"Just breathe Melissa, Just breathe."  I felt my entire world crumble. Before he even told me what happened I already knew. Part of the tooth broke. Which only can mean one thing. It can't be fixed it has to be pulled. I wanted to be sick.
We left to drive back home and I had an appointment the very next day with the oral surgeon to have it pulled. My children we amazingly wonderful on the way home.
That night I had my recurring dream of waking up and looking in the mirror and going to brush my teeth and when I open my mouth I only have black stubs and missing teeth. My dream was coming true. I started throwing up at four am.
I made my morning appointment and didn't have to wait. Everything went well with the exception that my tooth shattered into many little pieces and because of that and all of the rooting around he had to do I ended up having to have stitches. I was back on the road in under forty five minutes but the pain is still with me today.
I cannot explain to you how devastating this has been to me. I have spent thousands on my teeth starting back when I was fifteen and paid for my own braces by getting a job. My husband has perfect teeth not one filling in his entire head. Me my teeth have more silver than I know what to do with. When I was pregnant for Kadie I threw up allllllllllll of the time. Even though I brushed the acid wrecked my teeth. Before I had Kadie I didn't have one filling. Then when I had the other girls I went in for cleanings every three months because I was so sick and wanted my teeth to be okay. The dentist said then I would have problems and now I do.
When I smile it shows. I have to wait for at least twelve weeks before they can do anything because the space has to heal. An implant is almost five grand and my dental doesn't cover it. I can't even look at Z. I know it sickens him I can tell just by his eyes. They won't meet mine.....
I don't know why I care so much. Its a tooth not cancer. How vain am I? Maybe its because I now look like a lowlife and its not fair. I brush and floss. I go to the dentist regularly. I use fluoride rinse and everything else they tell me to get. I never have plaque or tarter so why DID THIS HAVE TO HAPPEN TO ME!? Crap crap on a stick. 


Mama Goose said...

Oh sweetie. I can't stand to think of how this is hurting you so. You are so beautiful despite the temporary gap. I'm sure the dentist will work with you to make your smile perfect again. You just have to ask. Hang in there. You'll get through it...xoxox

FishermansDaughter said...

Oh HONEY!!! Wish I could do something to make it all bettah right this second. I am your sister in tooth vanity / misfortune and am SO sorry you're going through this. The pain is just the poopy cherry on top of the crap cake. Maybe they can give you something for that? It's not fair, it's super duper shiteous and I've been exactly where you are...and...it all worked out, just like I know it will for you too. It takes more than a missing tooth to mar your gorgeousness. Now c'mere and give me a hug sister hillbilly LOL LOL OXOXOX

KimberlyDi said...

I have awful teeth too. I paid for a root canal/crown once and it still hurt and they couldn't find out why so it had to be pulled and then it abcessed! Darn teeth. Spend a fortune for nothing.

Big hugs!