Tuesday, February 28, 2012

Happenings (Is that even word)

Last weekend we dog watched this beautiful Greyhound. Her name is Zena. You have to love facebook. A boy (who is now a man) I knew in school posted her picture and asked is anyone could help him out for the weekend. Even though I haven't seen this person for twenty five? years I said if your close enough to me my family will. The funny part was, he doesn't live very close but he and his family were coming up to the closest city to me for a weekend of basketball. Can you even imagine.
Dane fell in love with her.

I thought spring was coming then we had a big snow. Crap.

I started homeschooling all of the kids again. This child made it three weeks and I sent her back to school because she is just like me.

This girl here and I are almost done school for the day. Except I took a blog break and she took an ipod break.
I think I need my head spun around because I can't believe I'm doing this again but that's another post. One that I hope I can write instead of keeping it to myself.

Thursday, February 23, 2012

The fun we have

Today we are going to discuss head lice. Well I'm going to do all of the talking and your just going to start scratching your head and body.

My beautiful lovely daughter brought us the gift of lice home three days before we were leaving to visit my dad and his wife. I found out she had it while I was french braiding her hair for school.

Since our other child was already at school, I called the school and told them I was coming to pick her up. Since the girls share a room I wanted to be sure she didn't have it and wasn't going to get it. I then called the lice child's school and they didn't care that she had lice. They said just wash her hair and send her back in. Jackasses. 

I picked Chrissy up from school and she was scratching the crap out of her head. I said when did you start to itch and she replied the minute you told me Mimi has lice.

We went to three stores and bought them out of lice products. I could see our vacation money dwindling.

Once we were back home Z and I had the task of washing and picking the girls hair. Chrissy did NOT have lice and never did get it. Dane on the other hand did. Thank goodness that he looks like a Q-Tip and it was easy to pick out. We didn't even have to use shampoo on him.

We took our trip to Florida and I picked the girls hair every day. I have to say it put a damper on the fun.

Plane ride home.....I see my kid in the seat in front of me and she's scratching. At the same time, I'm scratching. She leans back and looks at me with panic and at that time the very gay flight attendant catches my eye and whispers don't worry we have stuff that kills everything, I'll spray the seats after you get off. I WANTED TO DIE IN A HOLE!

We both had lice.
I then had the wonder job of calling my dad and telling him we had lice and they should probably just shave their heads. 

Fast forward to the middle of January when someone asks me to look at a child's head because they thought they saw a bug in the child's hair. I didn't want to but I said yes. What I actually said yes to was YES I WANT TO FREAKING GET LICE AGAIN!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Now it's the middle of Feb. and my hair is broken and damaged because of all of the harsh chemicals I have washed, sprayed and put into it. I pick my hair everyday. EVERYDAY people!!!!!  I dream of lice every damn night. It terrorizes me in my sleep and in my waking hours.

SO if you know someone with and or may have lice STAY THE HELL AWAY FROM ME!!!!!!!!! 

Tuesday, February 21, 2012

The Boy

He turned five on Valentine's Day. I still can't believe that my baby is five. I no longer have an infant-baby-toddler even a pre-schooler. I have a boy! Holy crap on a big rotten stick!

Speaking of crap. Since the boy is five I've decided it's high time he wiped his own backside. This is the toilet conversation we had today.

Dane: Moooooommmmmm! I'm DONE!
Me: Wipe your backside and I'll be in to check.
Dane: Okay, I'm ready.
I go in to check and see if he has poop smeared all over himself, the wall and the roll of toilet paper.
Dane: Do I have to do this?
Me: Yes- your five and your a big boy.
Dane: Can't Chrissy just wipe me from now on?
Me: No she can't because she has her own to wipe.
Dane: but mom, wiping my butt is so gross!
Me: I hear ya little man-I hear ya.

On another note....We started to home school all of the kids again but after three weeks Chrissy is going back to PS because being with Mommy all of the time is a drag. Or maybe mommy can't handle the hormones.......
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Saturday, February 18, 2012

Getting Back in writing

                                                                              The purchasing of Gus

Many years ago when Dave and I were newly married and my tears could still sway him,  Kadie and I used to go to work with him on weekend days. If we didn’t we would never see him. There really isn’t much to do when your husband’s setting up a driveway or a patio to pour concrete. Unless of course you actually want to help. I must be honest when I say that I didn’t want to help. What I liked to do was watch Dave work.  Nothing any better than watching a good looking man hard at work when that man is yours.

Kadie would bring her Barbie dolls and her beanie babies and what-ever else she could fit in her bag but she was only 6 and let’s face it she got bored rather easily.

This one Sunday she was bored and I was getting frustrated with her because nothing I did could keep her entertained. It was steaming out and we were directly in the scorching, hot, Florida sun. The people my husband was working for told us about a pet store a few blocks away. I thought BINGO this should keep us busy for awhile.

Little did I know that this day was going to be my and Dave’s first standoff with each other as a married couple.

Kadie and I grabbed our bottles of water and headed out to walk to the pet store. Or should I say puppy mill. When we walked into the store there were at least a hundred puppies all in kiddie wading pools. Probably eight to ten puppies per each pool. We wondered around for a long time admiring all of the cute wiggly puppies. All the while I had to keep telling Kadie no, we couldn’t get another dog. We already had a boxer and two cats that Dave was highly allergic to. When suddenly in one of the pools was the most beautifully ugly boxer puppy that I had ever seen.  He was chunky with a big tummy that begged to be rubbed. His liquid brown eyes would look at you and then roll in opposite directions and you could never (for his entire life) figure out exactly where he was looking. He also had thick green snot pouring from his nose and he smelled of something sour and rotten. Kadie and I were in love.

About that same time Dave strolls in and Kadie runs to him, grabs his hand and drags him to where I’m standing holding this precious bundle of smelly love. Dave wasn’t so smitten. While he assured us that yes the puppy was a nice puppy, we couldn’t afford one and further more this puppy was sick. He then told us he was almost finished and we should go back with him to help clean up so we could go home.

I have no idea what possessed me but I made a split second decision. I was going to act like a spoiled brat that wasn’t getting her way. (I didn’t see it like that at the time but I’ve had 19 years to think about it.) I grabbed Kadie’s hand and I said we aren’t leaving here without this dog. Dave shrugged his shoulders did an about face and walked out of the pet store. I smiled at Kadie and the bewildered look on her face and I said he’ll be back and this dog will be ours.

It was two hours before he finally came back and I was quite relieved because I was honestly starting to think he left us.

 I must tell you he wasn’t impressed with me but I wouldn’t give in. He would say we don’t need another dog and I would respond with, I want this puppy. He would say this dog cost $500.00 and I would say there are 550.00 dollars in the bank.  He would say I’m tired, it’s been a long day let’s go home and we’ll save for a puppy. I would stand and glare at him. He then pulled me aside from Kadie and let me know in no uncertain terms that I was acting like a brat and it was time to leave. I did the only thing I could do. I turned and gave Kadie a look, walked back over to her and we let the waterworks fly.

We named him Gus on the ride home.